As you may know by now, it’s been a bittersweet weekend in Tom Cruise’s family.

The mega movie star’s daughter, Suri, graduated from La Guardia High School in New York on Friday. She now goes by the name Suri Noelle, and has dropped Cruise after 12 years of no apparent communication with her father.

Cruise didn’t keep a low profile during graduation weekend. Instead he attended Taylor Swift’s concert in London last night, where he was very aggressively public about making an appearance, seen dancing on video, and so forth. Cruise rarely goes out in public, so this was a choice. He was sending a message.

When Cruise and Suri’s mother, Katie Holmes, split in 2012, it was because the actress had escaped the situation. And what was that? In 2005, Holmes was persuaded by Cruise to leave her life, her family, and her Catholic religion, to join him on a whirlwind. He forced Scientology on her. She was monitored when he wasn’t around by the cult’s members. These were the years when Cruise was jumping on TV couches, promoting the cult wherever he could, even indoctrinating his mother and sisters.

Luckily, Katie Holmes came from a close family. Her father and brother are lawyers. Eventually they created a pathway out for Katie and Suri. I do not know the details of the separation agreement. But it does seem like because of their rejection of Scientology, Katie and Suri were labelled “suppressive persons.” Tom was ordered to disengage with them, which is Scientology doctrine.

As far as the public knows, and what I’ve been told over the years, that was the end of the relationships. Dropping Cruise’s name is as much a choice for Suri and going to the Swift concert was for Tom. What a shame for a daughter never to know her father. And for a father to choose a religious cult over his daughter.

Suri is going to Carnegie Mellon University in the fall, a school for teaching actors. She’s following in the footsteps of her parents, regardless of not knowing one of them. Down the road, there’s always a possibility of an awkward public meeting. Just wait til Suri has to do an interview for a movie.

As for Cruise, the public loves him despite all this. They flock to his movies with him jumping out of planes, climbing skyscrapers, etc. So far, his bizarre private life — very much out in the open — hasn’t cost him a career. Just a family. His framed pictures aren’t of his daughter growing up, but with other cult members at the group’s events (see this one, for example).